General Info

Not a lot about me...

...But first I had to put all my stuff in a U-Store-It place over by the second Narrows Bridge.

It was late on a Friday afternoon, and I was the first client in this new path of mini-units they built. I was glad, because it meant the place was clean and I didnt have to worry if Jeffrey Dahmer had ever stored his boyfriends in my unit.

But then the lights went out and when I went to check the switch, I accidentally clicked shut the roll-down door. It locked, and because the place was new, they hadnt properly installed the fail-safe unlocking swich.

I was stuck in there with no lights. When I tried pounding on the door, there was no one to hear me. It was pretty bad... Okay I was in there for four days without light. The only thing I had to drnk was a bottle of Gatorade autographed by John Madden. I had to eat the gum from my Upper Deck SP authentic NFL Cards, with one autographed and squentially numbered rookie card per box, unlcuding Jerry Rice, Donovan McNabb, Bart Starr and Joe Montata. I was going to use them to fund my retirement.

The Gatorade lasted 50 hours, the gum, 72. It was a long weekend.

Since then, I needed as many edible objects around me as possible. Like my futon. It"s from this place in Finland. Cost me 2,500, but the entire futon is edible. They market them to Japanese people who are worried about earthquakes and being trapped alive.

My apartment is like Willy Wonka"s factory. You eat my chairs.

My stapler? Its made of Marzipan. I bought it online from this geek shop pased in Palo Alto. And these pencils here, chocolate.

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Just getting started. More to come.

About myself

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2 years ago

exciting profile pic

TheeRyan - Male

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