The Art of Being a Gentleman?
[2011-11-02 01:54:50 pm]
Y'know, sometimes I sit here and wonder whether or not chivalry IS dead, if romance IS passe, and I'm just late to the party, or if there are others out there who actually do believe in it. I'm amazed at the way technology has advanced over the years, yet society's view of women has degraded. We have become so accepting of a woman's nude body on television, in movies and myriad other venues shown in less-than-tasteful ways, that gentlemen seem to be in short supply.
Maybe it's the way I grew up, the son of baby boomers. But I believe that a woman, and women, should be treated special by the ones who love them, and well by men in general (heck, we'd all be better off if we all treated each other better). Does it really take that much energy to open the car door, hold her chair in, compliment her just because? Why has being nice become a lost art?
I see this reflected in my sexual fantasies as well. I find it much more sensual to see a woman in lingerie (not that nude is a bad thing--it isn't). Hell, even fully-clothed. We have become so spoiled by technology that everything is at our fingertips: information, images, news. As a people, we have become lost when it comes to our imaginations. However I, for one, LOVE using my imagination. I find that my mind can create fantasies and scenarios that elicit much more passion than having every question answered for me by a naked woman in high heels.
Why has the imagination become so rarely used? Why has being nice seemingly gone the way of the dinosaur? Guys, don't you freaking GET it?? A woman (based on my experience) will appreciate you opening her door, bringing her flowers on a first date, holding her purse while she visits the dressing room, and not one of those things takes extra time or energy, really. I love doing this, for many selfish reasons, the first of which is this: So few guys do these things without complaint anymore that it makes me seem that much more unique, special, selfless, romantic.
Selfishly, I WANT to be seen as special, unique, but I DO NOT believe in falsifying who I am to be seen in such a light. But I AM nice, I AM sweet, I AM romantic, so to me, doing these things aren't really "special" at all, they are just part of who I am and how I was made to be.
Maybe it's my inner drama geek, but I relish every opportunity to show off my romantic side. I LOVE to tell stories and create situations in which how I feel is expressed by doing what many call "the little things" like, for instance, opening that car door, bringing her flowers for no reason. These things are fun for me, and it's merely an added bonus that they make her feel special. Of course, my woman IS special, because I'm rather picky. But guys, it doesn't hurt to show her she's special now and again.
Then again, why am I complaining? Keep doing what you're doing, 21st-century man, and my old-school ass will keep getting the smiles and elicit the blushes that a woman offers when I'm nice to her. While you're at it, keep calling her "bitch" and "slut" and "whore" and the like. I'm the one she'll look at a second time, even if I'm not 6'2" 190 lbs. :-)